It’s been a few days, since – I dropped my mask, to you all, (here’s the link to that blog) and I’ve been overwhelmed by the support and well-wishes I’ve received. I’m confident that I’ve done the right thing, (for once in my life), and I’m filled with hope, and a renewed sense of optimism, within myself, as-well-as towards my fellow-man, and – woman.
My dad passed-away almost 16 years ago, and even-though we did make-amends before he died, I’ve never felt his ‘presence’ in my life, like I have with others who’ve passed-on. I had been thinking about my decision to ‘come out’ for months, and I’d talked to Erica about it on numerous occasions; but I couldn’t seem to get the nerve-up to actually do it. The tumblers were moving, but the lock wasn’t clicking into place, ya know…
On Saturday, I was working, and I had to contact a man named William Cone; (that’s the first time I’ve ever contacted someone named Cone, and he didn’t answer…) William was my dad’s middle name, and his father’s first name, as well. When I saw that name pop-up on the screen, my blog started spilling out of me, within minutes, right there at my desk! My dad and I didn’t see eye-to-eye, and it was, in-part, his unacceptance of me, that had led my life’s journey, thus-far. But, seeing that name was like a sledgehammer to the head: “I accept you, son. You have my blessing. Be happy…” I have no idea who William Cone is, and – getting his answering machine was probably fated; but, I want to thank him, anyway… To me, it was a message from God, too: “I’ve got your back. Go forth.”
The encouragement and support has come from some of the unlikeliest of places. Some of your responses have touched the blackest-places in my heart and, they have shed-light on my soul, in ways I never imagined. It’s like 48 years of tension has just drained right out my body! I feel better than I ever have… I know with every fiber of my being, that I’ve done the right thing, and – I’m proud of myself for ‘taking my life back.’
Thank you – ALL of you – for standing by my side, and for standing up. It’s meant the world to me… As a friend said: “Here’s to the next 48.” Damn right!
Love ya all,